A wet and weird night on the roads

I don't know why, but weird things always seem to happen when it rains. I always expect someone to approach me with a wheelbrace asking for help with a puncture, instead hitting me across the head with it. It's hard to define.

Tonight I think the cops were smoking weed. I went out to buy some cigarettes and approached a hairpin bend. A patrol car was coming the other way, and we passed on the 'apex'. Perfectly normal on my part, but when I look in the rear view mirror the patrol car was stopped - still in the middle of the bend.

I get to the service station and buy my cigarettes. What drives in? - yup, the patrol car. The attendant duly throws up the shutters to let a the female cop in to do shopping. After hours they serve through a hatch, but in Bray ( Ireland ) we operate a communist system. It goes a bit like this: the almighty and powerful walk past the ques of riff - raff standing in the rain.

On the way home a big swinging dick(head) in a Skoda tailgated me all the way down the N11 Dual Carriageway. Well, what would you expect? - after all, Skoda is a highly desirable performance car. I have always lusted after one. Well, on second thoughts no.

I did my usual routine when someone keeps it up: give 'em a face full of brake - lights without doing much braking. Jesus, this fool was a couple of metres from my back bumper! When he eventually overtook the guy behind him starts doing it too. He got the same. The laughable ( if it all weren't so dangerous ) thing is that the man in the sexy racing machine ( Skoda ) slowed down to the same speed as I was doing when he had passed me.

Either this was 1/ an attempt to annoy me, 2/ an attempt to get me to overtake with a view to showing me the performance of his Skoda ( in 2nd. gear ), or 3/ the dickhead didn't want to go any faster. I hope while all of this was going on that the Gardai enjoyed their doughnuts back at Fitzpatrick's Topaz garage. They spend so much time there every night that they may as well make that the police station.